Coping Skills

Below is a sampling of tools I often teach my clients & support them to practice in and out of sessions.

Take your time. Browse through. Visit often. And reach out if you’d like to schedule an appointment!

*Please note: While I hope these educational videos are helpful, they are not a substitute for therapy.

Ride the Wave

In this video I talk briefly about the skill, ride the wave. If it resonates with you, I invite you to practice it for yourself and support your work with a therapist. This skill is practiced for moments at at time and I encourage you to start small, no need to flood yourself. What is it like for you to drop the interpretation story, drop the narrative, drop the urgency to act on or escape from the emotion and directly sense it, coming and going, rising and falling as a wave, for moments at time?

Here are some steps on how to Ride the Wave:

Notice emotion is present

Sense into it

Don’t block it or suppress it

Don’t cling onto it or make it bigger

Allow the sensation to be here just as it is

Don’t act on it, or define yourself by it

Trust the sensations will rise, crest, and recede; Emotions ebb and flow, they come and go. They are transient. Emotions are signals and we can practice attending to our own signals with care, compassion, and curiosity.

Start small, experiencing waves of emotion, for short moments at a time.

CBT Triangle Record

Want to gain gentle insight into your internal experience? Let’s work on CBT Triangle Records. In this video I use the term “CBT Triangle Record” interchangeably with thought record. Technically, a thought record focuses on the activating event and automatic thoughts, with skill work to re-frame the automatic distorted thoughts. The CBT Triangle Record is a little different from that, because we’re not only looking at activating events and thoughts, we’re also noticing emotions and behaviors. We can then consider not only thought alternatives, but also supporting ourselves skillfully at the other two points of the triangle.

Steps for a CBT Triangle Record:

Write the activating event (just the facts-who, what, when, where)

Draw your triangle; write one aspect at each of the 3 angles: thoughts, emotions, behaviors

Write out your automatic thoughts. What’s the internal narrative? (don’t edit yourself)

Name the emotions you feel (sad, angry, afraid, etc)

Describe what behaviors you took, or any immediate urges that came up

Notice with nonjudgment and compassion; we’re not doing this work to judge or criticize

Go back in to one point of the triangle and identify alternate ways to take care of yourself, whether that’s by re-framing a thought to be more balanced and fair, or offering nonjudgmental care for your emotional experience, or shifting behaviors to align with your needs and values.

Please start this skill practice with small stresses. No need to start with the most difficult thing in your life. Over time, we can gain insight and awareness into our patterns, internal narratives, and automatic responses. As Deb Dana states, as we gain awareness, our understanding grows and our choices expand.

With all skills, I invite you to gently practice it for yourself and support your work with a therapist.

Please reach out or schedule a session if you’d like to work with me. I’d love to support you!